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The Family Guide to a Stress-free Wedding


Planning a wedding can be stressful for the bride, the groom and the entire family on both sides. Keeping your relationship with your loved ones in tact is essential to having wonderful wedding. So, here’s my take on things…

MOMS: If I could give mothers out there a bit of advice it would be to love your daughter enough to help her plan the wedding of HER dreams. This is not to imply that you should hand over a blank check or pay for something you simply cannot afford. What I’m saying is… support your daughter in her decisions and gently guide her when she is leaning in the wrong direction. After all, that’s what moms are for. Also, don’t think because you control the budget that everything must be the way you want it and the bride has no say. That’s a sure bet to alienating your daughter’s affection. Encourage your daughter to express her creativity and offer advice without being opinionated.

BRIDES: You play a big role in your own happiness and the success of your wedding. Not every bride out there has the good fortune of having a mother by her side when it comes to planning their wedding. This should be a time that you both cherish and enjoy. Sure, you have your fiancé but there are some things that only Mom can do. This kindest thing you can do for you mom is to allow her to be involved. You may have different styles and taste, but that should not prevent you from showing her the respect she deserves. It doesn’t hurt to ask for mom’s direction on matters that you’re not sure of. Also, don’t forget about your mother-in-law to be or your step-mother. If possible, find a way to involve her/them in your wedding planning. It’s a great way to create a lasting family bond.

IN-LAWS: Hopefully, at this point you have whole heartedly accepted your soon-to-be son-in-law or daughter-in-law. Keep in mind that your child loves him/her and the best gift you can give them is to find a way to love the person they love.

DIVORCED PARENTS: Oh boy! Where do I begin with this? OK here goes… it’s not your child’s fault that you divorced their mother or father. With that said, you cannot (and I can’t stress this enough) turn your son or daughter’s wedding into a family nightmare because you refuse to set aside your differences with your Ex for this one day. Bluntly said, you need to Suck it Up, Hold your Tongue and step up to the Parental Plate out of love for your child. I’ve seen more brides (and grooms) get so overly stressed about how to deal with their divorced parents, what role the parent(s) will play and how to make them happy. I could fill an ocean with the tears that some of my brides have shed. Please! Mom and/or Dad show your grown child how much you really love them on their special day.

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